throwing a stone into the ether.

 

This is my favorite painting, Fish Magic by Paul Klee!!!! 

(here's some run-on sentences about my initial experiences with it)

    As an art history student (let the record show I'm in the "regretting my major" arc, but that's a discussion we'll have later), I thought this painting would be a good place to start the blog. I also feel like this piece aligns with my vibe and does a better job of representing me than any photo or description I could provide. See that guy in the corner wearing the dunce cap? Yeah that's me. The orange + green color combo has also strangely been a recurring motif in my life. I also loveeeeeee the wacky two-faced guy with the coraly-pink hands, too. I love you lowers. I love you clock. I love you fishies. It's all pretty damn magical.

  This painting also reminds me of one of my favorite songs by Radiohead. (Let the record also show that it makes me mad as hell these guys have made such good music, as I can't stand the band's out of touch political takes.  Despite this, In Rainbows has remained cemented in my psyche and will always be dear to me due to the memories of the time period where I discovered it. Such is life.) 

     Ok back to Fish Magic- I've always been surrounded by and encouraged to love art, but it was AP art history in my final year of high school that made that love feel valuable.  It was the first instance where I truly internalized the fact that visual culture has and always will have a vast and profound impacts on human life. (tldr ART IS IMPORTANT!!!! duh!!!) I also think this class was so special due to the teacher: an eccentric, middle-aged photographer who taught the class in the strange room behind the art studio at the edge of campus. He was passionate enough about art history to spend decades perfecting his elaborate slideshows and lessons, share personal travel tips and anecdotes, tear up mid lecturing us about the turbulent life of Van Gogh or the intricacies of Marshall Island stick charts, and be a first hand example of how it's important to primarily let art make you feel things. I have no way of speaking for all my classmates, but as a generation prone to apathy I know that his fascinating historical insights alongside the passion he radiated turned a good amount of young minds away from the path of a desolate 21st-century-citizen existence. If that makes any sense. I know at least my exhausted, depressed, directionless 16-year-old self was significantly impacted for the better by this class.

    It was during the lesson on early 20th century expressionism in Europe when Fish Magic first appeared on the slide deck. "Oh AWESOMEEEEEE. This is so me. This is yummy I like it." was probably what my first thoughts about it sounded like. You can provide as many logical or emotional or scientific reasons for loving an art piece, but oh so often it comes down to "Idk i just fw this" being the bottom line. Why is this my favorite painting? I like the colors. I like the fish. I just fw it. I remember my next thought being about the aforementioned Radiohead song. The second I had that thought, I remember my teacher saying: "It reminds me of the Radiohead song, Weird Fishes / Apreggi." I probably jumped a little in my seat out of sheer excitement. I was on The same wavelength! This painting does look like that song! How sick is that! And it's about as simple as that, Fish Magic has truly been my favorite painting since.

    I have so many art yaps I want to get into and tidbits from that teacher I'd especially love to elaborate on. There's so much I want to share my knowledge about! And also so much I just want to explore and yap about too. At this moment in my life I have SO. MUCH. trouble. Just fucking writing things. Emails, memories, feelings, essays, school assignments- whatever it is getting words down scares me in an extremely irrational way. That's why I'm excited to dip a toe into blogging!!!! Spilling thoughts out in a fun, public way where there is simultaneously no expectations of an audience is great for me. Hopefully this will build up my tolerance for doing this thing that my brain is telling me is scary and hard. Because I know writing is so much more than scary and hard, and I'm so excited to tap into that "more" again. So I'm throwing a stone out into the ether and seeing what that does for me. I think it might be good. Here's to sincerity, vulnerability, and a very blogful 2026. Here's to fish magic! 

Peace and Love :p